my happiness

seeing other people with their own happines aren't always a good thing to look at. sometimes, there's a flame burning in my heart to see them. the heat starts to ignite especially when they gain anything that's good in their life. why do i feel this kind of feeling?
would it make me happy if i had the same happiness that they have? would it make me happy if i had the happiness and they didn't?
what is exactly my definition of happiness? is it the things that can make other people jealous? is it the things only i can have and others don't?
or is it when i see other people see me with jealousy for the things i can have and they don't?
is jealousy the only meaning of happpiness that i understand? why i should be happy or sad because of jealousy?
cause i like to see people wanting to have the things that i have. cause i hate to see other people have the things i wanted the most. cause i want only i can have the things that are precious to other people.
yes, is confess to have this kind of feeling.
geez, i need to cool down and think again about my own happiness. cause i've always wanted to believe that true happiness is accomplished when there is a comfort feeling in my heart for what i have and what i don't have.